Romancing the Pasta

26 Aug

I love noodles. Thin, wispy angel hair. Thick, sauce-grabbing fettuccine. Transparent, curry-covered rice noodles. Potato and cheese stuffed Polish dumplings. You name it, I eat it. I also adore the slightly foggy, warm calmness that follows a big bowl of pasta. It’s a delicious haze of comfort I crave every day of my life.

This is unfortunate for me, however, because I have Type II diabetes. The more white, un-enriched, bleached-flour pasta I eat, the higher my blood sugar soars. This dangerous state is what causes the cocoon of noodle peace. It’s also what causes my headaches, days, even weeks, of lethargy, depression and concentration difficulty.

One would think this sort of information would cause me to curb my pasta enthusiasm. The bad news for my future self is that it currently does nothing but make me want to eat more pasta. In fact, the Pad Thai I had for lunch today was orgasmically rice-noodlerific. As I sit typing this, I can feel the stupor over take me.

All I can think is when can I have this again? Why didn’t I eat TWO orders? I could double this feeling! Hell, slide right in to a starch-induced coma. Wouldn’t that be just grand? I wouldn’t have to deal with my chin(s) resting on my chest, my labored breathing after a flight of stairs or the inability to get comfortable in bed at night. Just the sweet foggy peace of pasta overload.

Before you ask, of course I know this is a completely insane way of thinking. Of course I understand that I am risking my health. And yes, I get that avoidance-by-coma is not the best way to deal with every day problems, especially since said coma contributes to the problem.

One would think that an intelligent, educated, woman of the world such as myself would grasp such truths and use them as fuel for change. Instead, I spin my wheels, repeating the same cycle of depression-foodcraving-overeating-weightgain-depression until I am sick with it. When will I ever learn?

Probably right after the nice big bowl of macaroni and cheese I think I’m going to have for dinner.

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