back to the future

2 Apr

I just emailed the therapist I had when I lived in Houston to see if she’d consider counseling me over email or something. She was really really awesome and I swear I considered not moving because I didn’t want to stop seeing her.  I found her using the Eating Disorder Referral and Information Center which I highly recommend. It’s comforting to know going in that the person you are seeing at least recognizes that being overweight is an eating disorder. I tried to use it to find someone here but none of the therapists listed are covered by my insurance. SHOCKING!

There is part of me that doesn’t really see any value in continuing to go therapy. I mean, I know, I know what my issues are and where they come from and what my danger zones are and how I feel about my mother/father/4th grade teacher and what to eat and what not to eat and what my trigger foods are and how my body is addicted to carbs and sugars and how if I don’t exercise I am going to die young and have full-blown diabetes and so so so many other things that you learn in therapy. I’ve been doing it since I was ten. I have so much knowledge, I feel like my brain will burst with it. It’s the doing that I have a hard time with. I can (and do) talk about my problems for HOURS and type about them for YEARS and it doesn’t do any damn good if I don’t DO DO DO something.

Of course, now I am going to go stare at my email and hope that she emails me back soon.

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One Response to “back to the future”

  1. Cate April 2, 2009 at 3:06 pm #

    But it’s the ‘doing’ that therapy is there to help with. It’s not just about how you feel about things, it’s about the way you think, and the way you process emotions, mentally and physically. That’s all rooted in formative experiences, sure, and that’s important stuff to get at – but even after that’s all rooted out (if it ever is), the question then is, how do I reeducate my brain? How do I get it to understand that think does not equal unsafe? How do I move from where I am to there? What are the baby steps?

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