3/4 is better than 0/10000000

7 Apr

I made it to about 4pm yesterday on my quest to not eat out during the week. I brought food with me for breakfast (almond butter and a banana), a healthy snack (carrots and fat free yogurt ranch dip), and an easy and tasty lunch (Kashi’s Mayan Harvest Bake). I also had a bag of Glenny’s soy crisps at my desk for any emergency munching. Gold stars for planning!

Of course, I spent the entire day obsessing about the food. Once breakfast was consumed, I started looking at the clock hoping that it would give me a clue when it was okay to eat the carrots. As I was eating the carrots, I was thinking about how much I fucking hated eating fucking carrots and how a fucking bag of potato chips would be a lot fucking tastier. Then I stared at the clock some more, waiting for it to be time to eat the frozen dinner.  Then about 3pm, I decided I need some chocolate RIGHT NOW so I went to the vending machine, which didn’t have exactly what I was looking for so I just got a Diet Coke. And then ate the bag of soy crisps.

Around 4pm, it started to feel like someone had scraped out my insides with a rusty melon baller. All good intentions flew out the window and I began to plan my pizza binge. I even called on my walk home so it would get there faster. I also ordered two cans of Coke. YES, COKE! THAT THING I GAVE UP SEVEN YEARS AGO!

I ate and ate and ate (potato chips, too) and ate and ate. Then I had an ice cream sandwich. Then I went to bed at 9:30.  So much for just letting myself feel the misery.

But I started over today, so we’ll see. My only obsessing so far has been the time I spent at Trader Joe’s trying not to buy every starchy product in the place and this here journal entry.  More gold (a bit tarnished but still!) stars for me.


One Response to “3/4 is better than 0/10000000”

  1. Chrissy September 9, 2009 at 11:03 am #

    You may have already seen this article, but it offers some interesting perspective on why we overeat, esp. with our favourite foods — less about the psychological/emotional side and mroe about the physiological/neurological side. I think it’s particularly interesting because since it’s by and large women who struggle with their weight like this, so much focus is put on issues of emotions and psychological willpower — and then here’s a book/article by a man where he steps back and acknowledges that this is a *human* problem, not a *woman’s* problem, and starts to actually look at the scientific foundation. Does it explain everything? Is it necessarily correct? Maybe not, but it’s an interesting counterpoint:


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